npub10w…4zf5s on Nostr: I feel you. My mother is 87. Has a whole list of things wrong with her she won’t ...

I feel you. My mother is 87. Has a whole list of things wrong with her she won’t address. She also has a DNR and has instructed the family not to call an ambulance to save her when something eventually happens.

I have to put my own natural reactions in check, I would fight to stay alive. She has accepted the unavoidable reality of death. She doesn’t want to die, but she is ready to die. Pretty baller move when you think about it.

At this point I would not be showing love by asking for or trying to convince her to do what I think is best, but rather accepting and supporting her wishes. It sucks, I don’t like it, but that’s what will make her feel better. So I agree to let her finish her life on her terms.

Your grandma sounds like she is in the process of getting to acceptance of her own mortality. The best thing you can do is to give her what she wants and stop pressuring her to do what you want. Buy her a carton of smokes, tell her you love her and you’ll support her in whatever she wants. That will make her happy. It won’t fix anything, but it will make her happy.