Hoss "Sneed (Formerly Chuck)” Delgado on Nostr: >be me >formerly normal grocery shopper >oil is oil >butter is butter >mayonnaise is ...

>be me
>formerly normal grocery shopper
>oil is oil
>butter is butter
>mayonnaise is mayonnaise
>life is simple
>make catastrophic mistake of reading one thread about seed oils at 1:30 AM
>come out the other side spiritually unable to view a nutrition label the same way again
>go to supermarket next morning
>pick up loaf of bread
>soybean oil
>why
>put it back
>grab hamburger buns
>soybean oil
>tortillas
>canola oil
>crackers
>sunflower oil
>granola
>expeller-pressed safflower oil
>protein bar
>vegetable oil blend
>vegetable oil blend
>what vegetables
>which vegetables are being squeezed for oil
>have never seen anyone wring a broccoli
>start checking things that logically should not require oil
>dried cranberries
>sunflower oil
>raisins
>sunflower oil
>seasoning packet
>canola oil
>peanut butter
>rapeseed oil
>excuse me
>buy roasted nuts
>ingredients: almonds, sunflower oil, sea salt
>THE ALMOND ALREADY CONTAINS OIL
>WHY DID YOU OIL THE OIL
>walk into frozen aisle
>every product has the same microscopic ingredient list
>"contains 2% or less of soybean oil, canola oil, cottonseed oil, sunflower oil, palm oil, natural flavors, xanthan gum, spiritual malaise"
>realize seed oil isn't an ingredient anymore
>it's atmospheric
>it's the culinary equivalent of microplastics
>restaurant menu says "grilled chicken"
>excellent
>ask waiter what it's grilled in
>"our house vegetable oil blend"
>there is no escape
>order steak
>"we brush the grill with canola oil"
>order steamed vegetables
>"finished with our garlic-infused soybean oil"
>order plain baked potato
>waiter begins sweating
>"the potato supplier lightly coats them in vegetable oil for..."
>STOP
>go home
>decide to cook everything myself
>buy cast iron pan
>butter
>beef tallow
>olive oil from a bottle with more provenance documentation than my birth certificate
>finally safe
>roommate walks in
>"hey anon I bought some nonstick cooking spray"
>look at label
>CANOLA OIL, SOY LECITHIN
>hear Dark Souls boss music
>week later become That Guy at every social gathering
>"what oil did you use?"
>"anon it's birthday cake"
>"ANSWER THE QUESTION"
>friend hands me chips
>turn bag around before accepting
>sunflower oil
>hand recoils instinctively
>friend looks at me like I'm inspecting the ingredients for plutonium
>eventually realize half the modern food supply appears to be based on one fundamental culinary principle:
>take a perfectly edible substance
>find some way to spray soybean or canola oil onto it
>sell it
>even foods marketed as healthy
>"ancient grain organic superfood clusters"
>ingredients begin with oats, quinoa, chia
>beautiful
>keep reading
>CANOLA OIL
>they got the ancient grains too
>Mesopotamia has fallen
>start shopping exclusively around perimeter of store
>meat
>eggs
>produce
>dairy
>feel like medieval peasant avoiding cursed interior aisles
>occasionally venture into center for coffee
>inspect label anyway
>100% coffee
>finally
>one product has escaped
>cashier sees me reading it
>"sir, that's coffee"
>I KNOW WHAT THEY'RE CAPABLE OF
>seed oil redpill isn't even believing they're uniquely poisonous anymore
>it's simply noticing them
>once noticed they become impossible to unsee
>soybean oil is hiding behind every cupboard door like fucking Slenderman
>canola oil is somehow in both the salad dressing and the "buttery" popcorn
>sunflower oil has infiltrated dried fruit
>cottonseed oil exists despite cotton famously not being food
>every time I think I've escaped
>new product appears
>"Made with REAL AVOCADO!"
>check ingredients
>canola oil, avocado oil
>avocado oil listed just high enough to legally put a green avocado on the front
>mfw modern food manufacturers apparently regard seed oil as the culinary equivalent of mortar
>nothing may be constructed without it
>mfw I just wanted lunch